Stay: Ritual, Equilibrium & Embracing Change
What if the secret to transformation wasn’t in chasing the next thing, but in staying—staying with discomfort, with ritual, with yourself?
In a world that urges us to move forward, to fix, to heal as quickly as possible, what if true liberation is found in stillness? What if transformation is not about arrival but about our ability to witness, surrender, and be with what is—fully and without resistance?
We often think of death as a singular event, a finality. But what if death is something we are meant to experience daily?
Not just physical death, but the dissolution of habits, identities, and outdated ways of being, the loss of expectations, attachments, and illusions. If we resist these small deaths, we stagnate. If we embrace them, we open ourselves to a deeper way of living.
The Daily Practice of Death & Rebirth
I came across an old passage from The Tibetan Book of the Dead that struck me profoundly:
“at a more mundane level, we also frequently meet with another form of death—a counterpart to our familiar conception: our habitual patterns of expectation and reaction to circumstances often lead to a deathlike stagnation and unanimated redundancy within our experience.”
These words stayed with me. Deathlike stagnation. Unanimated redundancy.
If we do not allow ourselves to release, to let old versions of ourselves fall away, we become trapped—moving through life on autopilot, reacting instead of responding. We grip so tightly onto what we know that we leave no room for what could be.
And yet, we fear death. We fear change.
We grasp for control. We search for certainty. We cling to the familiar, even when it no longer serves us.
This is where ritual, presence, and deep inner work become essential. They create a container in which we can navigate transitions—not with resistance, but with reverence.
How Ritual Helps Us Stay with Discomfort
There are moments when everything in us wants to run—when grief, uncertainty, or transformation feels unbearable.
But what if, instead of escaping, we learned how to stay?
Staying does not mean suffering. It does not mean we remain in spaces, relationships, or cycles that harm us. It means we cultivate the tools to sit with discomfort, to witness our own unfolding, to trust that rebirth is always on the other side.
This is why ritual is essential. Ritual is what allows us to mark endings with intention and meet beginnings with clarity.
Some ways to practice ‘staying’ in daily life:
Meditation & Breathwork – Learning to pause before reacting, witnessing thoughts instead of attaching to them.
Sacred Grief Rituals – Honoring what has ended rather than suppressing grief or rushing forward.
Somatic Practices – Movement, breath, and embodied awareness help us process emotions without becoming overwhelmed.
Self-Inquiry & Reflection – Asking, What is trying to fall away? What am I being called to release?
Daily Offerings & Ancestral Connection – Recognizing that we are always held in something greater than ourselves.
When we have these practices, we no longer grasp for control in the face of uncertainty. Instead, we move with change, rather than against it.
The Cost of Resistance vs. The Gift of Surrender
I once opened my copy of The Tibetan Book of the Dead and landed on this passage:
“O, Child of Buddha Nature, if you have not taken to heart [the introduction] which has gone before, from now on, the body of your past life will grow more faint and the body of your next life will grow more vivid. At this, you will be dismayed, and you will think: ‘I am experiencing such misery! Now I will look for whatever kind of body I can find.’ Thinking in this way, you will move haphazardly and randomly towards whatever might appear and consequently …”
Even in death, there is the temptation to grasp for the first thing that feels safe—a new form, a new distraction, a new way to avoid the in-between.
But what if, instead, we trusted the process?
What if, instead of frantically searching for the next thing, we simply stayed—stayed in the void, in the unknown, in the discomfort of what is falling away?
The Sacred Ritual course was created as a path for exactly this kind of practice. It is not about avoiding grief, pain, or transition. It is about learning to be with them, to meet ourselves fully, to move through change with reverence instead of fear.
Through self-paced guided meditations, ritual practices, and reflection exercises, The Sacred Ritual helps you cultivate the inner stillness needed to hold yourself through life’s transitions.
If you are in a season of endings—or if you simply want to deepen your ability to stay—I invite you to explore the Sacred Ritual course.
Liberation is in the Staying
"To grip is to create stagnation. Liberation is in the staying."
Transformation is not something we chase. It is something we cultivate through presence, ritual, and our willingness to let go of what no longer serves.
Staying is not passive. It is a radical act of trust.
It is a choice to meet each moment fully, to witness our own unfolding, and to let ourselves be shaped by what is coming next rather than clinging to what has already passed.
And so I ask you:
What would it look like for you to stay?
To stay in ritual, in presence, in relationship with yourself?
To breathe through the discomfort instead of reaching for escape?
If you are ready to deepen into this practice, I invite you to:
Book a 1:1 session for personalized grief support & ritual guidance.
Explore The Sacred Ritual course—a self-paced journey into stillness, self-inquiry, and presence. [link]
Wherever you are, stay. Stay in ritual to yourSelf.
with reverence,
Minerva
